Today is not a good day. I think I am going to try and get tattooed this week.
I really miss David.
And I knew this was coming.
That one comes home on Tuesday. That one was supposed to come into my work yesterday. That one is in a relationship he doesn't want to be in. That one is just a good time.
If I don't have something to immediately satisfy me or distract me, I go back to what I know. And I'm trying to break that habit. But he is so easy to go back to. Because lately it seems a lot easier to be disappointed than ecstatic. My moments of happiness are short these days. Today I felt like calling him just to tell him how much I hate him, wish nothing but the worst for him, and also that I miss him. Too bad I didn't. Instead I'll just lay in my bed and stare.
Im going to say it once again til I instill it
I know Im going to feel this way until you kill it
The other ones are nice. Just new, I don't know how I feel about that- for real.
I guess what's bothering me the most is the fact that I proved myself right. Normally I would bluff a lot, say certain things just because I knew they weren't true. But now I am realizing all the times I said "he doesn't give a shit about me," are turning out to be right on point.
Being right has never felt so awful
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